A thought provoking story put with beautifull cinematography is standard recipe for good movie. Swades, was a noble attempt by Ashutosh Gowariker. I recently watched for the first time and loved it at first instance for all its ingenuity. Afterall how many movies have you watched where the "hero" sports the same shirt in 3 different shots at 3 different locations. Although there was a marathi village camouflaged as one in Uttar Pradesh and no one cared even to change the architecture of houses, and then there were marathi actors abusively faking UP accent, and it seemed like inspired by priyadarshan films where everyone was content are wearing "whites", UP villages are colourfull, atleast in terms of clothes (white clothes get dirty quickly, and we are lazy people, yes I am from UP). That is where my "production value" irritation ends.
It was a spendid story, NRI returning to India, for a practical cause, no melodrama attached. He lives in a village and finds caste, poverty, lack of education and above all laidback attitude of the village only to realise that he ought to be a part of this and give his share of contribution to its upliftment. I was a bit mellow to see the poverty, and also ashamed at the fact that I needed to watch a movie to realise the poverty which I have seen with my own eyes in real life. For a moment, I too wanted to return to my village and work for the people there (consider this as an impulse similar to crying while watching movies), but as soon as movie ends process of thinking moves from heart to head. Everything went well with Shahrukh making electricity, had the movie been a bit longer, we would have seen several government officials flockering over the village to ask for permits for almost everything.
The could have misunderstood the message from the director, but I really don't see the village as potrayed by him. To begin with the caste system, I am not an avid supporter, but it takes a lot bit more than a crying, emotional, mellow, shaved chest NRI to convince the villagers to reject the notion of caste. Also, I fail to understand why almost always the upper castes are shown elitists, and invariably all the miserable ones are the dalits, julahas et al. The poor kisaan shown in as the julaha who turned to farming, well it could very well be a brahmin, infact in eastern UP it would most probably be a brahmin.
With all due respect to them but the attrocities on these "backward" castes is highly hyped, just walk into any village from Allahabad to Buxar (Eastern UP), and randomly ask about the land ownership, almost all the land is owned by Yadavs (an OBC), Brahmins are anything but rich there, thanks to the reservation policy the employment for these "upper castes" are minimal. Last time I visited my village, there were celebrations in a fellow Dubey family because their son got into CRPF as sainik after 4 yrs of attempt, we met and talked, he told me that all his samauriyas (bhojpuri for same age peers) who were from "backward" classes had made it in first attempts and now sit a position or two above him. I woke up in the morning 4 o'clock, and in the beautifull sunrise I saw a bunch of 15 or so young boys running barefeet on a tar road for 4-5 km, before the thought of health conciousness could kick in, my uncle told me that they were preparing for army recruitment of sipahi , it didn't take me long to realise that defense had no reservations (why should OBCs, SC, STs die for the country, they are National Treasure afterall), so tht is almost only choice left, but still aren't there 50% seats left for other government services? well apart from UPSC, NO. All the vacancies are forcefully filled by OBC, SC and STs in UP Gov services, to fill infor backlog. While I was there, a notice came for the recruitment for UP Police, 300 posts and 0 for general category, by order Bahan Mayawati.
That could be just UP right? well, there are 50 Sulabh Shauchalayas in Delhi, and ALL are taken care of and cleaned by Brahmins, so much for "elite", 50 % of rickshaw pullers in NCR are Brahmins with a daily wage of 100-150, almost 90% rickshaw pullers in Benaras are Brahmins.
Yadavs sit on the 90% of assembly seats of UP and Bihar combined. 75% of domestic help in Andhra Pradesh are Brhamins and purohits are the only priest class of all major religions who live below poverty line. Village after village brahmins are displaced by dalits because dalits have 5-6 children each as they can place them with ease. Murders of brahmins, or a group of them would never be reported beyond local dailies, but "humiliation" of a dalit becomes a crime of national importance. So it should not be hard to understand that why more and more "brahmins" and "thakurs" take it to self employment of kidnapping and extortion, most famous dons on the STF top 10 list are all from these "upper castes". But still we all upper castes, who luckily make it to IITs or IIMs should "work" for "their" country to see their children slog to fight for that seat which an OBC, SC, ST might get at negative marks as well (in BHU entrance in some year in late 90's, cutoff for SC's was -5).
Now you might be tempted to talk like JNU type jhola chhap left "thinkers" and shower me with words like "social justice" etc., then either you are one of those "lower","opressed" class yourself, or you might shut up when you see your children in a position as mentioned above.
That is just to speak of the caste factor, and I also know these are just excuses because it is tough to get rid of the "ferrari" of your dreams, or the "rolex" you always wanted afterall "Hawai" is much better a honeymoon destination than "kullu manali". But it is not just an excuse, coming back to work at your "swades" is anything but as shown in the movie. My dad and I were upset over the condition of roads in our village, so my dad went and spoke to the village pradhan and asked him that we should meet the MLA or MP to talk this out, and pradhan ji idiotically replied "dekha pandi ji, vidhayak, sansad ke ihan apne laikan ka naukri lagawe bade jaai, ki i kul sadak jaisan chhot mot kaam bade jaai" (look, mr dubey, we would goto MLA or MP to get jobs for our sons, not for petty issues like roads), it might be interesting to know that the pradhan, MLA and MP all are from the same "backward" caste.
Last summer we thought of opening a good school in the village and when we were talking about the condusiveness of the idea, we got the route. Dozens of permits, bribes, life threat from a local goon (actually a pehelwan) who runs the "jagardev ahir inter kaalej", I finally postponed the idea of even thinking about that. (the school was no profit venture, infact it was a loss venture when thought from business perspective)
Coming back is not as easy as taking a flight ticket, it sounds very exciting when Shahrukh khan says "I am going places", but you just can't expect someone to leave a better life to come back and work hard to bring negative to positive, there are people who do it and think they have done something for their country, I am sorry to say, the ground reality says something else.
I have never been to US but had I been in SRK's position as shown in the movie, I would have stuck to the thought swades hai "tera", "mera" swades hone mein abhi bhi bahut der hai.
PS: generous lift of data from http://www.rediff.com/news/2006/may/23franc.htm
I don't have any grudges against "backward" caste people, I have several of them as good friends, and I realise reservation "was" necessary for upliftment.
Also neither I nor my family has any qualms against my marrying outside of caste, it's just that the look at the condition of Brahmins on the ground and the one as potryaed in the media frustates me.
Friday, 30 May 2008
Thursday, 29 May 2008
Sivaji in BAAS
Yesterday I watched two movies, back to back. Swades and Sivaji-The Boss (tamil with english subtitles), it was interesting how the two movies are very similar yet they occupy totally different zones in our perception. Both the movies have their and their lead actors names begining with 'S' (in case you are wondering, Rajnikant's real name is Shivaji Rao Gaekwad), both have the "superstars" of their respective regions as their lead actors, both have the plot as an NRI coming back to the country (with different reasons offcourse), both find their love interest in India, both movies have their music score by A.R.Rahman. Well the similarities end here. Sivaji was a movie which amused me but did not take me by cliche of Rajni outperforming the bullet, the same people (mainly MTV worshippers and pseudo intellectual art praisers) who criticise Rajni's physics defying acts are the ones who will sleep with anyone to get the premier show invite to "oscar" winner "Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon" as if it sticks to all physics principles. Rajni flying is a catastrophe and Chow Yun Phat flying is art.
I have been to Tamil Nad and I understand what place cinema and its grandeur has in a typical tamil life. Rajni's larger than life action is not what concerns us "northies" while watching the movies, its mainly their body language, tamil body language looks like overreaction to any untrained naarth indian eye, but that is the way they are, they are expressive. Just stand in a busy market at Pondy bazar and you shall know that the body language shown in the tamil movies is anything but exageration, its their way of expression much like Italians can't say a word without making gestures with their hands.
No wonder 5 out of 7 chief ministers of Tamil Nadu (yes, 7, before 1960's tamil nadu was Madras state or Madras presidency something like that) have cinema connections. A typical tamil actor career is doing support roles, moving to Villian, then to hero and then a hero who is potrayed as doing good to the society much like what rajni does in sivaji (in case you don't know "the boss" in "Sivaji the boss" stands for Bachelor Of Social Service). Finally stop before end is either joining a political party of opening a new one and the career ends in getting a ministerial berth.
I can write on and on about why we have a problem watching Rajni dance with women half his age or why we can't digest him chewing the buller half way in its flight, but the thing is you would hardly understand unless you go to Tamil Nadu and realise their way of living. Much like you would never know how heartache feels like, unless you have it.
I have been to Tamil Nad and I understand what place cinema and its grandeur has in a typical tamil life. Rajni's larger than life action is not what concerns us "northies" while watching the movies, its mainly their body language, tamil body language looks like overreaction to any untrained naarth indian eye, but that is the way they are, they are expressive. Just stand in a busy market at Pondy bazar and you shall know that the body language shown in the tamil movies is anything but exageration, its their way of expression much like Italians can't say a word without making gestures with their hands.
No wonder 5 out of 7 chief ministers of Tamil Nadu (yes, 7, before 1960's tamil nadu was Madras state or Madras presidency something like that) have cinema connections. A typical tamil actor career is doing support roles, moving to Villian, then to hero and then a hero who is potrayed as doing good to the society much like what rajni does in sivaji (in case you don't know "the boss" in "Sivaji the boss" stands for Bachelor Of Social Service). Finally stop before end is either joining a political party of opening a new one and the career ends in getting a ministerial berth.
I can write on and on about why we have a problem watching Rajni dance with women half his age or why we can't digest him chewing the buller half way in its flight, but the thing is you would hardly understand unless you go to Tamil Nadu and realise their way of living. Much like you would never know how heartache feels like, unless you have it.
Tuesday, 27 May 2008
It's not a lion daddy!
A newly made friend told me that cliches are not negative, they have stood the scrutiny of time and repeated public usage to become cliches. I couldn't agree more, even though it was a totally new way of looking at cliches. One such cliche is fathers bond much better with their daughters than sons and same goes true for sons and moms. I have always observed the way fathers care about and bond with their little girls. I was at crossword this weekend, and there was a man in his early thirties, with his cute 4 yr old princess. The girl looked like an angel in her bright polka dotted frock, combined with a little hat held on her head with the help of an elastic band. The mother was nowhere to be found, no wonder the dad looked much more relaxed, at peace and much more jovial bonding with his little one. So the girl was frolicking around the shop catching the attention and cuchi-coo of all the fellow "readers", she was unfazed with whether it was philosophy section of self help, all she was looking for was her Mickey mouse sketch book. Given the disappointment I had with the books at the shop, I couldn't help but to eavesdrop on the father-daughter conversations.
"do you like this book?" asked the dad pointing at the mickey colour book, "yes, but I want that tiger" came the answer, I wasn't sure what she was talking about untill I saw the Narnia Lion on display.."it's a lion dear, not a tiger" ah, preaching papa..."it's a tiger, daddy, see"..."beta, see the hair on his neck, and there are no stripes"...."no, it's a tiger, it eats people see! daddy!" pointing at the canine tooth of the toy, she continues "but this one is a little one, it does not eat people, I'll call it smokie", aah women learn their tricks rather early in life :).
Daddy defeated, but happy went ahead to add the toy in her basket. She was more than delighted, and there seemed to be some instinct in girl children which both enhances to become maternal and enchants us men - She embraced the "tiger" like holding a baby, while nearby a boy a bit older than her took the lion by its tail and whirled it around thinking it would serve as a helicopter rotor to lift him up.
The daddy was periodically checking his blackberry but his point of focus was his girl. The same was the case with the girl, although she was having a tough time carrying both the "tiger" and the book, she kept on playing in a small "moving" circle centered at her daddy. When the daddy moved to business books, her play area was from self help to cash counter, when the daddy was at DVD section, the play area was between Hindi old cinema to cartoon DVDs. She had a perfect precision of staying within 3 feet of her daddy. Then rang the phone, daddy picked up, spoke a few words with a face not very bright, then passed on the phone to the princess, "do u wanna speak to mom", she picked up "yeah mom, i got this new tiger" that would suffice and off she was to decide whether she wanted High School Musical 1 or 2, and later she settled on both.
The entire time they were there, the daddy repeated the same sentence " do you want this?" and little lady kept on nodding in yes or no. A similar instinct happens with our girlfriends, we keep asking and they only nod in a yes. There is a remarkable similarity here, most of us long for a girlfriend who is cute rather than hot, and when it comes to a daughter no matter what she is always cute, and every moment of bonding with her goes like a first date - it's all about her. I have never seen dads declining any request of daughters unless it is extremely unreasonable. When the daughter arrives it feels like being young again and the instinct to care and put her first before anything is enhanced much like first college girlfriend, it's just an instinct we have. That is why girls' dads are the most dreaded creatures in any guy's imagination, they just want the best for their little ones.
Finally, the dad saw me observe them, I smiled and nodded, the girl took refuge behind his legs peeping out to see me. I refrain from coochi-cooing children, because I feel they despise it. So I made some faces, she seemed to like it not because the faces were funny, but because she was grown up enough to realise "what is wrong with this guy? do u really think u r funny, grow up dude". Some small talk with her dad and off I went, only to wish that my first child should be a girl.
PS: Not to say mothers care less about their little ones, afterall they are their daughters' best friends.
"do you like this book?" asked the dad pointing at the mickey colour book, "yes, but I want that tiger" came the answer, I wasn't sure what she was talking about untill I saw the Narnia Lion on display.."it's a lion dear, not a tiger" ah, preaching papa..."it's a tiger, daddy, see"..."beta, see the hair on his neck, and there are no stripes"...."no, it's a tiger, it eats people see! daddy!" pointing at the canine tooth of the toy, she continues "but this one is a little one, it does not eat people, I'll call it smokie", aah women learn their tricks rather early in life :).
Daddy defeated, but happy went ahead to add the toy in her basket. She was more than delighted, and there seemed to be some instinct in girl children which both enhances to become maternal and enchants us men - She embraced the "tiger" like holding a baby, while nearby a boy a bit older than her took the lion by its tail and whirled it around thinking it would serve as a helicopter rotor to lift him up.
The daddy was periodically checking his blackberry but his point of focus was his girl. The same was the case with the girl, although she was having a tough time carrying both the "tiger" and the book, she kept on playing in a small "moving" circle centered at her daddy. When the daddy moved to business books, her play area was from self help to cash counter, when the daddy was at DVD section, the play area was between Hindi old cinema to cartoon DVDs. She had a perfect precision of staying within 3 feet of her daddy. Then rang the phone, daddy picked up, spoke a few words with a face not very bright, then passed on the phone to the princess, "do u wanna speak to mom", she picked up "yeah mom, i got this new tiger" that would suffice and off she was to decide whether she wanted High School Musical 1 or 2, and later she settled on both.
The entire time they were there, the daddy repeated the same sentence " do you want this?" and little lady kept on nodding in yes or no. A similar instinct happens with our girlfriends, we keep asking and they only nod in a yes. There is a remarkable similarity here, most of us long for a girlfriend who is cute rather than hot, and when it comes to a daughter no matter what she is always cute, and every moment of bonding with her goes like a first date - it's all about her. I have never seen dads declining any request of daughters unless it is extremely unreasonable. When the daughter arrives it feels like being young again and the instinct to care and put her first before anything is enhanced much like first college girlfriend, it's just an instinct we have. That is why girls' dads are the most dreaded creatures in any guy's imagination, they just want the best for their little ones.
Finally, the dad saw me observe them, I smiled and nodded, the girl took refuge behind his legs peeping out to see me. I refrain from coochi-cooing children, because I feel they despise it. So I made some faces, she seemed to like it not because the faces were funny, but because she was grown up enough to realise "what is wrong with this guy? do u really think u r funny, grow up dude". Some small talk with her dad and off I went, only to wish that my first child should be a girl.
PS: Not to say mothers care less about their little ones, afterall they are their daughters' best friends.
Monday, 26 May 2008
All I wanted to do was read a good book
Yesterday was a brilliant day in Mumbai, lazy Sunday afternoon, 35 degrees with 90 % humidity and no air conditioning in my apartment. What better to do than to go to the nearby air conditioned bookshop and savour some literary works. I went to Crossword, one of first and most famous bookstore chains, stepping in was a nice respite from the humid heat. Neatly stacked books everywhere. Usually I go to small book shops, tell them the books I want the voila! I am done shopping. Even with bookshop chains, I pretty much follow the same modus operandi. This was pretty much the first time I was there to "find" a good book to read, and off course observe people :)
Although it was a small store by floor area, I felt an acute need for a map. So before I could get lost, I started browsing randomly, the first section on display was "Latest Arrival", nice hard bounds and paperbacks neatly stacked. Just a glance through it enlightened me that the cost of Iraq war was 3 trillion dollar, there was some Indian princess who apparently had an extra marital affair with some Italian actor, there was some Templar/Gothic secret which was not deciphered for 800 years untill some 25 yr old professor from North Central Western University did it. I had an urge to write a book with title "The Reader is a jackass" and keep it there but then I thought maybe some off-season was going on in printing business, hence lets pass the section and move to regular favourites.
On the left came the Indian authors' section, I had always thought Indians had less exotic English, and it seems I was wrong always. The titles themselves were so cryptic as if they were carefully drafted to play the game "guess whats inside just by reading the title". Forgive me for being ignoramus but I really fail to understand whats there in the book titled "An Equal Music", or "The Interpreter of Maladies", but then again we are the people who are credited with world's longest poem. So I picked up 5 books randomly from the section, and skimmed through the pages and synopsis. Invariably all had some form of 1947, Bombay, Calcutta, Royalty etc., it seems all the Indian authors are just not ready to accept that India today and India yesterday are different, apart from Bombay, Delhi and Calcutta there are cities like Indore, Varanasi, Lucknow, Pune which house some good population of the country, and they are oblivious to pre independence royalty, adultery in south Bombay and nostalgia of Calcutta coffee house.
With some disappointment and a little hope, I moved away to western fiction section. Just like their Indian counterparts, they too suffer the problem of writing again and again about the same thing, I mean isn't there anything other than Lawyers, adultery, super rich, doctors and medieval Europe secret to write about? and to make it worst, there was a section at the bottom with little flower in the publishers' name, it was unmistakably Mills and Boons, the entire publishing is based on the idea of taking multiple type of people in the population and making them love each other one by one. One book had lawyer loving a doctor, other had banker loving a lawyer, then there was a cartoonist loving a nurse so and so forth, only there were no engineers to be found.
Briefly I glanced through the Health and cooking section, and I realised Tarla dalal had published as many books as the number of recipes known in an average household. Also there was a health magazine which had a tempting headline "your way to 6 packs in 6 weeks", now that is tempting..
Finally before I was about to give up, I landed up in Business books section, It is the most entertaining of all. Somehow I have noticed, business books and self help books are usually stacked together (off course with demarcation on segments), so there was a youngish guy reading "Men are from mars, Women are from Venus", poor guy, just out of a breakup..
There were the regulars there, which told me that there were some 10 things which millionaires did, there are some 15 ways by which I could become an investment super guru and what are the 20 things that made Toyota, Honda and Mitsubishi...and there was new league as well, a league of economists claiming that everything in the world is based on economics (=)) as if economics is a science), they could tell me who pays for my coffee by economics (genius!! I must say).
Finally I ended up in the Dilbert section, picked up the only book which I haven't read and ended the voyage. At the back of every penguin book their business inception idea is written, "all he wanted to do was to read a decent book" was the idea that led the founder of Penguin Books to open the company. That is exactly what I wanted to do, if only any publisher or author meant anything by this idea.
PS: I hold deep respect for all authors everywhere, it's just that I also hold deep respect for my inner cynic :)
Although it was a small store by floor area, I felt an acute need for a map. So before I could get lost, I started browsing randomly, the first section on display was "Latest Arrival", nice hard bounds and paperbacks neatly stacked. Just a glance through it enlightened me that the cost of Iraq war was 3 trillion dollar, there was some Indian princess who apparently had an extra marital affair with some Italian actor, there was some Templar/Gothic secret which was not deciphered for 800 years untill some 25 yr old professor from North Central Western University did it. I had an urge to write a book with title "The Reader is a jackass" and keep it there but then I thought maybe some off-season was going on in printing business, hence lets pass the section and move to regular favourites.
On the left came the Indian authors' section, I had always thought Indians had less exotic English, and it seems I was wrong always. The titles themselves were so cryptic as if they were carefully drafted to play the game "guess whats inside just by reading the title". Forgive me for being ignoramus but I really fail to understand whats there in the book titled "An Equal Music", or "The Interpreter of Maladies", but then again we are the people who are credited with world's longest poem. So I picked up 5 books randomly from the section, and skimmed through the pages and synopsis. Invariably all had some form of 1947, Bombay, Calcutta, Royalty etc., it seems all the Indian authors are just not ready to accept that India today and India yesterday are different, apart from Bombay, Delhi and Calcutta there are cities like Indore, Varanasi, Lucknow, Pune which house some good population of the country, and they are oblivious to pre independence royalty, adultery in south Bombay and nostalgia of Calcutta coffee house.
With some disappointment and a little hope, I moved away to western fiction section. Just like their Indian counterparts, they too suffer the problem of writing again and again about the same thing, I mean isn't there anything other than Lawyers, adultery, super rich, doctors and medieval Europe secret to write about? and to make it worst, there was a section at the bottom with little flower in the publishers' name, it was unmistakably Mills and Boons, the entire publishing is based on the idea of taking multiple type of people in the population and making them love each other one by one. One book had lawyer loving a doctor, other had banker loving a lawyer, then there was a cartoonist loving a nurse so and so forth, only there were no engineers to be found.
Briefly I glanced through the Health and cooking section, and I realised Tarla dalal had published as many books as the number of recipes known in an average household. Also there was a health magazine which had a tempting headline "your way to 6 packs in 6 weeks", now that is tempting..
Finally before I was about to give up, I landed up in Business books section, It is the most entertaining of all. Somehow I have noticed, business books and self help books are usually stacked together (off course with demarcation on segments), so there was a youngish guy reading "Men are from mars, Women are from Venus", poor guy, just out of a breakup..
There were the regulars there, which told me that there were some 10 things which millionaires did, there are some 15 ways by which I could become an investment super guru and what are the 20 things that made Toyota, Honda and Mitsubishi...and there was new league as well, a league of economists claiming that everything in the world is based on economics (=)) as if economics is a science), they could tell me who pays for my coffee by economics (genius!! I must say).
Finally I ended up in the Dilbert section, picked up the only book which I haven't read and ended the voyage. At the back of every penguin book their business inception idea is written, "all he wanted to do was to read a decent book" was the idea that led the founder of Penguin Books to open the company. That is exactly what I wanted to do, if only any publisher or author meant anything by this idea.
PS: I hold deep respect for all authors everywhere, it's just that I also hold deep respect for my inner cynic :)
Friday, 23 May 2008
Information Overdose
Paul Julius Reuter might be the first person to exploit the financial power of information but the importance of information was known to humans since time immemorial. I believe it should be put in the same league as that of food, shelter, clothes and sex. But unlike these, information is something which is good only in stipulated amount. Less information is fatal, so is excess information. One might argue, excess information can make money, well I feel that is not excess information, that comes well inside stipulated information zone. Excess information should be thought of something as you want to know but you shouldn't know.
I feel I should have been much more happy, if I was not polluted by vestigial information. While in school, I enjoyed studying all subjects, and I never bothered how others scored. Soon I was informed how others scored higher in maths, biology etc. so instead of enjoying the subject and learning, I started finding out shortcuts to solve maths problems, and mugging up biology. It didn't stop there. At almost every stage of life, the information of what others are doing directed my course of action. When I made it to IIT, the first thing I did was to figure out how many from my class in school made it along with me and I have to confess the joy of knowing that I was the only one from my class was much more than the joy of making it to the most prestigious engineering college in India. After IIT if I see myself as stand alone and weigh my pleasures in life, I shall be more than content but the desire for excess information led to me gather that I stand in the median deciles of salary of my graduation class, so despite the fact that I earn almost 3 times of most of my friends from not so exotic colleges, I am still unhappy just because I know half of my graduation class earns more than I do.
I have been in consistent pursuit of happiness, and the biggest trouble has been information, excess information. We are a over informed society, we keep in touch with almost all our peers, be they from school, college or workplace. Internet and social networking sites have only made it worst. I recently broke up and it was one way, (i.e. I did not want it to happen), so like every breakup the friends also part ways, my friends on my side, her friends on her side, and mutual friends have to either take sides or maintain a diplomatic stance. But I made one fatal mistake of keeping in touch with one mutual friend who knew little of diplomacy, she told me my ex got married. Now I would have done very well if I was not supplied with that information , but now that I was given that information, the desire for excess information kicked in and I went ahead and dug out every thing about my ex's new muse, only to make myself much more miserable by comparing myself with him. Looking back, I feel I would have been much more happier had I not known these developments.
Something similar happened when I was the mutual friend in one of my friend's breakup. The guy mailed me some pics of his new girlfriend, the girl however was very keen on knowing how is he doing in his post breakup life. I told the girl, "if you really want to get over it, don't try to figure out what he is doing in his life, help me help you", but we all know how seriously we take others' advice, that too unsolicited advice. She checked my computer and told me, "the new girl is not as beautiful as I am", I agreed, "yupp!",
"I am more beautiful, ain't I", I replied "do you care?", she was a bit confused "I guess, I do"
"why?"
She didn't have a reply for that, and I could see her visibly distressed for another couple of weeks. No one but her own curiosity to know unnecessary information added the gloom in her life.
I took CAT 2006, I scored decent but didn't get any calls, I was not that unhappy, until I called one of my old school pals she had made it to IIM L, I and K GD/PI list, I acted as if I was more than delighted to hear the news, but now the pain of my failing to make it to the list was exacerbated. I would have done much better in handling the failure had I not pursued the hunger for unnecessary information.
We all must have seen the classic, A few good men and the famous scene where Jack Nicholson replies to Tom Cruise's quest for truth as "You can't handle the truth", I think that is the case with most of us. Most of us buy sorrow by looking for information we want to know but we shouldn't know.
I am desperately trying to keep myself off the information pollution highway, with little or no result. When our forefathers said ignorance is a bliss they were not joking, we would have realised that only if we had taken the high school proverbs' chapter seriously.
I feel I should have been much more happy, if I was not polluted by vestigial information. While in school, I enjoyed studying all subjects, and I never bothered how others scored. Soon I was informed how others scored higher in maths, biology etc. so instead of enjoying the subject and learning, I started finding out shortcuts to solve maths problems, and mugging up biology. It didn't stop there. At almost every stage of life, the information of what others are doing directed my course of action. When I made it to IIT, the first thing I did was to figure out how many from my class in school made it along with me and I have to confess the joy of knowing that I was the only one from my class was much more than the joy of making it to the most prestigious engineering college in India. After IIT if I see myself as stand alone and weigh my pleasures in life, I shall be more than content but the desire for excess information led to me gather that I stand in the median deciles of salary of my graduation class, so despite the fact that I earn almost 3 times of most of my friends from not so exotic colleges, I am still unhappy just because I know half of my graduation class earns more than I do.
I have been in consistent pursuit of happiness, and the biggest trouble has been information, excess information. We are a over informed society, we keep in touch with almost all our peers, be they from school, college or workplace. Internet and social networking sites have only made it worst. I recently broke up and it was one way, (i.e. I did not want it to happen), so like every breakup the friends also part ways, my friends on my side, her friends on her side, and mutual friends have to either take sides or maintain a diplomatic stance. But I made one fatal mistake of keeping in touch with one mutual friend who knew little of diplomacy, she told me my ex got married. Now I would have done very well if I was not supplied with that information , but now that I was given that information, the desire for excess information kicked in and I went ahead and dug out every thing about my ex's new muse, only to make myself much more miserable by comparing myself with him. Looking back, I feel I would have been much more happier had I not known these developments.
Something similar happened when I was the mutual friend in one of my friend's breakup. The guy mailed me some pics of his new girlfriend, the girl however was very keen on knowing how is he doing in his post breakup life. I told the girl, "if you really want to get over it, don't try to figure out what he is doing in his life, help me help you", but we all know how seriously we take others' advice, that too unsolicited advice. She checked my computer and told me, "the new girl is not as beautiful as I am", I agreed, "yupp!",
"I am more beautiful, ain't I", I replied "do you care?", she was a bit confused "I guess, I do"
"why?"
She didn't have a reply for that, and I could see her visibly distressed for another couple of weeks. No one but her own curiosity to know unnecessary information added the gloom in her life.
I took CAT 2006, I scored decent but didn't get any calls, I was not that unhappy, until I called one of my old school pals she had made it to IIM L, I and K GD/PI list, I acted as if I was more than delighted to hear the news, but now the pain of my failing to make it to the list was exacerbated. I would have done much better in handling the failure had I not pursued the hunger for unnecessary information.
We all must have seen the classic, A few good men and the famous scene where Jack Nicholson replies to Tom Cruise's quest for truth as "You can't handle the truth", I think that is the case with most of us. Most of us buy sorrow by looking for information we want to know but we shouldn't know.
I am desperately trying to keep myself off the information pollution highway, with little or no result. When our forefathers said ignorance is a bliss they were not joking, we would have realised that only if we had taken the high school proverbs' chapter seriously.
Tuesday, 20 May 2008
the 3 mistakes of my life
There are only a few things I hate more than my emotions - cricket, medical students/doctors, pseudo intellectual religious humanism and darkness, "the 3 mistakes of my life" had them all. After reading "5 point someone" and "A night at call centre" I was determined not to fall for another Chetan Bhagat nonsense, but luck seems to be on his side. While waiting for the delayed flight at the airport, 250 pages for 95 Rs, seemed like a deal to me moreover there was a curious fascination with the bright yellow cover of the book, Ok! ok! I accept it, whatever be the level of despise for his last two books, I wanted to read his new book (something similar to a morbid fascination).
An old saying warns us against judging a book by its cover, for me though the entire reading experience begins from the visual sense. The cover of the book is important to me, not to judge but it is a part of the experience. With a bright yellow cover and 3 silhouettes standing as cricket stumps with bells off, it looked more like a film poster than a book cover, no wonder his acknowledgement page has names like salman khan, sharman joshi and "all my friends in the film industry". The synopsis of the book had words like "Ahmadabad", "year 2000", "dreams", "turbulent city", I was not hard to figure out that the book takes Gujarat riots and Earthquake as its backdrop.
The book begins with a prologue, where Mr. Bhagat mentions the source of this story, much like the one in his last book. Then the story begins in first person narration with the protagonist being the narrator. It takes a fascinating yet dark tour of Ahmadabad. I would not say that the the pages are as spellbinding as any thriller fiction, but it is a reasonably hard to keep the book down before finishing it. I like reading fiction and listening to radio mainly because it involves a lot of imagination, so is the case with this book. However the imagination part is not tough here, because it is the story of a middle class youth, his aspirations, his failures, his love, his regret, his friends and his thinking. Five pages into the book and I could relate to this Mr Govind Patel (narrator), picturing the rest of narration was easy. The story is fairly predictable, but still I was hooked on to it, just because I wanted to cross check whether my prediction is correct or not. The book moves back and forth between predictable path and unpredictable detours. I started reading the book at 11 in the morning and finished it at 8 in the night, in the meanwhile I had my share of smiles for I recalled my triumph, my first romantic talk, my first date and my first kiss, I had my share of agony for I recalled my failures, my bad judgements, my choice of engineering over cricket. It was an extended roller coaster ride of emotions.
The praise for the books mention "the biggest selling english-language novelist in India's history" and when you read this book, you will find the reason for this. We have numerous novels about middle class youth, or the common man, but most of them have come from the likes of Vikram Seth and Pankaj Mishra. They still have a hard time reconciling with the fact that middle class youth or the common man can not relate to book which has to be purchased with a dictionary and they are fascinated with the image of India they have taken from their young age i.e. 70's, 80's and the early 90's. They remain to be the pseudo intellectual elitist.
Chetan Bhagat on the other hand, writes easy to read, simple English and the elements of the story are so much realistic to the modern day middle class, you can't help but to love it. Right from binary career choice of doctor vs engineer to shoe string budget birthday celebration of first love, everything is impeccably life like detailed. The book has a joke about the size and weight of the IIT preparation maths book by M.L.Khanna, there is a mention of the terrifying content of Resnick Halliday Physics, there is a cricket match description as viewed from our living room and trust me you would feel as if you were part of the discussion. The love story is as chocolaty as it could be, from hand made "get well soon" cards hidden in maths books, to the guy getting scared of mention of the two dreaded "P" words, it has it all. It was a sudden realisation while reading that in real life, real teenage life relationships do not start with "I Love you", but they progress from friends, to close-friends, to true-close-friends to "I missed you" before actually getting down to the 3 mystical words.
The book was a fun read, but I couldn't help but to notice certain similarities from other works. For instance, Govind's popping of a sleeping pill with every sentence was shamelessly identical to the end of Khushwant Singh's "The Company of Women", Ali's cricket voyage was in theatres near you sometime ago, it was called "IQBAL", and the end fight sequence was a cocktail of so many bollywood potboilers that I didn't even bother to recall the original ones. With so much of grief and darkness in the beginning and some moments of joyful heights I expected the book to end on a dark yet optimistic note, rather than the happy, cheerful, filmy ending. But I guess that is why both his previous works are getting on 70 mm now, the reading is much like watching a movie, a much more involving movie.
An old saying warns us against judging a book by its cover, for me though the entire reading experience begins from the visual sense. The cover of the book is important to me, not to judge but it is a part of the experience. With a bright yellow cover and 3 silhouettes standing as cricket stumps with bells off, it looked more like a film poster than a book cover, no wonder his acknowledgement page has names like salman khan, sharman joshi and "all my friends in the film industry". The synopsis of the book had words like "Ahmadabad", "year 2000", "dreams", "turbulent city", I was not hard to figure out that the book takes Gujarat riots and Earthquake as its backdrop.
The book begins with a prologue, where Mr. Bhagat mentions the source of this story, much like the one in his last book. Then the story begins in first person narration with the protagonist being the narrator. It takes a fascinating yet dark tour of Ahmadabad. I would not say that the the pages are as spellbinding as any thriller fiction, but it is a reasonably hard to keep the book down before finishing it. I like reading fiction and listening to radio mainly because it involves a lot of imagination, so is the case with this book. However the imagination part is not tough here, because it is the story of a middle class youth, his aspirations, his failures, his love, his regret, his friends and his thinking. Five pages into the book and I could relate to this Mr Govind Patel (narrator), picturing the rest of narration was easy. The story is fairly predictable, but still I was hooked on to it, just because I wanted to cross check whether my prediction is correct or not. The book moves back and forth between predictable path and unpredictable detours. I started reading the book at 11 in the morning and finished it at 8 in the night, in the meanwhile I had my share of smiles for I recalled my triumph, my first romantic talk, my first date and my first kiss, I had my share of agony for I recalled my failures, my bad judgements, my choice of engineering over cricket. It was an extended roller coaster ride of emotions.
The praise for the books mention "the biggest selling english-language novelist in India's history" and when you read this book, you will find the reason for this. We have numerous novels about middle class youth, or the common man, but most of them have come from the likes of Vikram Seth and Pankaj Mishra. They still have a hard time reconciling with the fact that middle class youth or the common man can not relate to book which has to be purchased with a dictionary and they are fascinated with the image of India they have taken from their young age i.e. 70's, 80's and the early 90's. They remain to be the pseudo intellectual elitist.
Chetan Bhagat on the other hand, writes easy to read, simple English and the elements of the story are so much realistic to the modern day middle class, you can't help but to love it. Right from binary career choice of doctor vs engineer to shoe string budget birthday celebration of first love, everything is impeccably life like detailed. The book has a joke about the size and weight of the IIT preparation maths book by M.L.Khanna, there is a mention of the terrifying content of Resnick Halliday Physics, there is a cricket match description as viewed from our living room and trust me you would feel as if you were part of the discussion. The love story is as chocolaty as it could be, from hand made "get well soon" cards hidden in maths books, to the guy getting scared of mention of the two dreaded "P" words, it has it all. It was a sudden realisation while reading that in real life, real teenage life relationships do not start with "I Love you", but they progress from friends, to close-friends, to true-close-friends to "I missed you" before actually getting down to the 3 mystical words.
The book was a fun read, but I couldn't help but to notice certain similarities from other works. For instance, Govind's popping of a sleeping pill with every sentence was shamelessly identical to the end of Khushwant Singh's "The Company of Women", Ali's cricket voyage was in theatres near you sometime ago, it was called "IQBAL", and the end fight sequence was a cocktail of so many bollywood potboilers that I didn't even bother to recall the original ones. With so much of grief and darkness in the beginning and some moments of joyful heights I expected the book to end on a dark yet optimistic note, rather than the happy, cheerful, filmy ending. But I guess that is why both his previous works are getting on 70 mm now, the reading is much like watching a movie, a much more involving movie.
Wednesday, 14 May 2008
We are like that only
While in a boring office meeting in the office, a document was required and one of my colleagues rushed out saying, "I am having it in my system, I am just bringing it". Being an MBA ASSpirant, wrong english in any form generates an irritation similar to the one created by sound of scratching chalk on glass board. Even though my knowledge of the language is half cooked to say the least, it doesn't stop me from correcting people when they speak incorrect english. In the process I have offended, my BTP guide, my dad, my brother, my boss and the list goes on...
English is not our first language, although India has the highest number of english speakers in the world (power of population you see!). So despite the fact that most of us have learnt english right from the primary school, we have an instinct to translate from the vernacular when we speak. So ideally when it should be "I take the exam", we say "I give the exam". But if you think translating vernacular is the only problem then I might add here that the bigger problem is whatever english we are exposed to, is American, we are surrounded by American movies, American songs, American advertisements. So when McDonald's catch line says "I'm lovin' it", it escapes unnoticed that the queen would have committed suicide at the look of it.
Take your pick, Times of India, India Today, Outlook, Indian Express can all be used to practice sentence correction. They all are full of blunders. But, didn't our parents ask us to read "english" newspapers to improve english? If only their innocence allowed them to see the crap in those papers.
I learnt most of my english speaking from HBO and Star Movies in the summer vacations of school time. Not a very wise choice I must say, then one day I was watching British classic "Yes Minister!", there Sir Humphrey utters "It was I, minister!", I was utterly confused, shouldn't it be "It was me", we usually say "It's me". Well, it turned out that usually we are wrong. I is subjective case and me is objective case and blah blah blah. Turning back to Wren and Martin seemed like call of the day, but it turned out that it had its share of discrepancies. So out of sheer frustration I thought why the hell am I supposed to learn pure english just for the sake of getting into a B-School? When the truth is that colloquial english is miles away from classic queen's version. Well is it? It took me a lot of time to realise that while Americans are happy saying, "johny and me went to the parlor", their books and formal language are by and large devoid of such crimes.
If at this stage you are asking what is the way to perfect english, I would say I don't know, I tried reading good non-fiction (I don't have any reservation against fiction, find writing non-fiction more intellectual), but I am very lazy there, I tried getting my basics correct, which were pretty much correct I gathered. It is just the pollution of incorrect english that erodes the all the good english in you. If you can find a way to get away from such pollution, kindly enlighten me.
Whatever be the case, whatever be the level of pure english we inculcate and farther the distance becomes from our vernacular...a majority of population in this country would still confidently throw sentence like "I am having two children" but isn't that the way language evolves? and speaking of us Indian, well "we are like that only".
PS: With all due respect to the author of the book "we are like that only", nor have I read it, neither do I know the author. I just came across it in a book shop and the title was tempting enough to write an article about it.
English is not our first language, although India has the highest number of english speakers in the world (power of population you see!). So despite the fact that most of us have learnt english right from the primary school, we have an instinct to translate from the vernacular when we speak. So ideally when it should be "I take the exam", we say "I give the exam". But if you think translating vernacular is the only problem then I might add here that the bigger problem is whatever english we are exposed to, is American, we are surrounded by American movies, American songs, American advertisements. So when McDonald's catch line says "I'm lovin' it", it escapes unnoticed that the queen would have committed suicide at the look of it.
Take your pick, Times of India, India Today, Outlook, Indian Express can all be used to practice sentence correction. They all are full of blunders. But, didn't our parents ask us to read "english" newspapers to improve english? If only their innocence allowed them to see the crap in those papers.
I learnt most of my english speaking from HBO and Star Movies in the summer vacations of school time. Not a very wise choice I must say, then one day I was watching British classic "Yes Minister!", there Sir Humphrey utters "It was I, minister!", I was utterly confused, shouldn't it be "It was me", we usually say "It's me". Well, it turned out that usually we are wrong. I is subjective case and me is objective case and blah blah blah. Turning back to Wren and Martin seemed like call of the day, but it turned out that it had its share of discrepancies. So out of sheer frustration I thought why the hell am I supposed to learn pure english just for the sake of getting into a B-School? When the truth is that colloquial english is miles away from classic queen's version. Well is it? It took me a lot of time to realise that while Americans are happy saying, "johny and me went to the parlor", their books and formal language are by and large devoid of such crimes.
If at this stage you are asking what is the way to perfect english, I would say I don't know, I tried reading good non-fiction (I don't have any reservation against fiction, find writing non-fiction more intellectual), but I am very lazy there, I tried getting my basics correct, which were pretty much correct I gathered. It is just the pollution of incorrect english that erodes the all the good english in you. If you can find a way to get away from such pollution, kindly enlighten me.
Whatever be the case, whatever be the level of pure english we inculcate and farther the distance becomes from our vernacular...a majority of population in this country would still confidently throw sentence like "I am having two children" but isn't that the way language evolves? and speaking of us Indian, well "we are like that only".
PS: With all due respect to the author of the book "we are like that only", nor have I read it, neither do I know the author. I just came across it in a book shop and the title was tempting enough to write an article about it.
Tuesday, 13 May 2008
Quoting your way to becoming intellectual (atleast sound like one)
Today morning, while still enjoying my first cup of coffee in the office, I ran into one of my "well read" colleagues. I tried some small talk but she was ruffled by the cat that crossed her path in the morning, "do you believe in superstitions Mr. Dubey", she asked with apprehension in her voice, here was the point where my genes kicked in, being a guy asks for being witty and smart sounding in such situations. I said with a smile "Well, I don't believe in superstitions but whats the harm in touching wood"(bulls eye!). She seemed impressed, "Bertrand Russell?", I was taken by surprise, I said "I think it is Sir George Bernard Shaw" (that is the only name I know, who people know but never read), "Wow!" came the reply "I am an avid follower of Mr. Shaw, what all plays have you read".....I thought "plays???? I thought he was a philosopher", clearly a catastrophe was about to happen here, I got myself together and answered "Well, I read a couple of them while I was young (mind you I am 23) "
before she could ask precisely which ones, her manager called for her, she left saying "We should meet over a coffee and discuss some of his works!", I smiled and she left.
"phew, it was close" I thought.
What is the point of this entire self embarrassing story of mine? To begin with, we all want to be intellectuals (if only we knew what intellect means), being one is a tough and time consuming job. So we all settle with sounding like one, at least so much that most of people we meet should think of us as well read, smart and full of wit (somewhere close to intellectual behaviour). Quoting Great people is the quickest and best way of doing this. However, in the process we end up making fools of ourselves, something like what I did today morning. So I decided, I need to enlighten you up with some do's and don't of the process. (remember the Reliance commercial, bhaiya hindustan mein muft ki advice bahut milti hai! :) )
Buy a quotes book, read it every morning. The catch here is there are two types of great people, one who all of us know about and the other only a few elite know about, for example Mahatma Gandhi and Friedrich Nietzche. Learn a mix of quotes from both these segments. Now, quoting Mahatma Gandhi would be safe, no one would ask whether you have read "My Experiment with truth", but the effect is not as grand as quoting Friedrich Nietzche but it may boomerang on you if the person asks you "Impressive, do you follow Nietzche?", and you end up wondering whether Nietzche was a philosopher or a 50's Hollywood star.
So depending on the person you are facing you could quote someone you know slightly about or you could quote someone whom none of you know anything about. The entire art is to judge the person. For instance while meeting someone over business, safely quote the author of last book you read (if you do not read books for god sake memorise the best seller (non-fiction) chart from India-Today), because the person in question would most likely be an MBA and he too shall be trying to give an impression of intellectual. Whereas, if you face a girl whom you want to hit on, quote some exotic unknown person, preferably French something like Jean-Paul Sartre (it sounds very exotic, trust me), in all probability she would be impressed without asking questions (again, we all have our bad days, like today morning).
Another big "in your face" problem is, confidently quoting someone whose book you have read or are reading...but you take a big hit when we are asked what other books have you read of the author. For instance, you are reading "Jurassic Park" and you quote something on Fractals or Chaos theory, when asked about what all other books you have read from Michael Crichton, you are clueless and the person is left thinking "AAh! it's just a one book tide you are riding on"...So it's always a good habit to read the "Other works from the author" page in the book, if possible also learn what the books are about.
Before I end, a quick reminder on who all are quotable and who all are not. I don't question your intelligence here, but I have seen people quoting Shahrukh Khan in an effort to look cool, for heaven's sake it is a sure shot recipe for disaster. A good quotes book would solve such a problem, but to be on the safe side, try not quoting someone from the entertainment or sports unless the person is very old or belonged to some golden era. You can safely quote Humphrey Bogart, but do not quote Tom Cruise. Prefer western names over Indian ones, quoting Indians is utterly uncool unless they are veteran politicians, poets or famous scientists also Indian names are risky as everyone would know about them.
I hope my unsolicited advice comes handy to you, although I have not written an separate disclaimer, if ever anything goes wrong with my unsolicited advice, then kindly use your brains and escape from the situation like I did today morning.
"Most people are other people. Their thoughts are someone else's opinions, their lives a mimicry, their passions a quotation." - Oscar Wilde
PS: I assume here that you are smart enough to avoid out-of-context quoting. You don't really need to read this post if you quote Winston Churchill's quotes on War when the discussion is about a cricket match.
before she could ask precisely which ones, her manager called for her, she left saying "We should meet over a coffee and discuss some of his works!", I smiled and she left.
"phew, it was close" I thought.
What is the point of this entire self embarrassing story of mine? To begin with, we all want to be intellectuals (if only we knew what intellect means), being one is a tough and time consuming job. So we all settle with sounding like one, at least so much that most of people we meet should think of us as well read, smart and full of wit (somewhere close to intellectual behaviour). Quoting Great people is the quickest and best way of doing this. However, in the process we end up making fools of ourselves, something like what I did today morning. So I decided, I need to enlighten you up with some do's and don't of the process. (remember the Reliance commercial, bhaiya hindustan mein muft ki advice bahut milti hai! :) )
Buy a quotes book, read it every morning. The catch here is there are two types of great people, one who all of us know about and the other only a few elite know about, for example Mahatma Gandhi and Friedrich Nietzche. Learn a mix of quotes from both these segments. Now, quoting Mahatma Gandhi would be safe, no one would ask whether you have read "My Experiment with truth", but the effect is not as grand as quoting Friedrich Nietzche but it may boomerang on you if the person asks you "Impressive, do you follow Nietzche?", and you end up wondering whether Nietzche was a philosopher or a 50's Hollywood star.
So depending on the person you are facing you could quote someone you know slightly about or you could quote someone whom none of you know anything about. The entire art is to judge the person. For instance while meeting someone over business, safely quote the author of last book you read (if you do not read books for god sake memorise the best seller (non-fiction) chart from India-Today), because the person in question would most likely be an MBA and he too shall be trying to give an impression of intellectual. Whereas, if you face a girl whom you want to hit on, quote some exotic unknown person, preferably French something like Jean-Paul Sartre (it sounds very exotic, trust me), in all probability she would be impressed without asking questions (again, we all have our bad days, like today morning).
Another big "in your face" problem is, confidently quoting someone whose book you have read or are reading...but you take a big hit when we are asked what other books have you read of the author. For instance, you are reading "Jurassic Park" and you quote something on Fractals or Chaos theory, when asked about what all other books you have read from Michael Crichton, you are clueless and the person is left thinking "AAh! it's just a one book tide you are riding on"...So it's always a good habit to read the "Other works from the author" page in the book, if possible also learn what the books are about.
Before I end, a quick reminder on who all are quotable and who all are not. I don't question your intelligence here, but I have seen people quoting Shahrukh Khan in an effort to look cool, for heaven's sake it is a sure shot recipe for disaster. A good quotes book would solve such a problem, but to be on the safe side, try not quoting someone from the entertainment or sports unless the person is very old or belonged to some golden era. You can safely quote Humphrey Bogart, but do not quote Tom Cruise. Prefer western names over Indian ones, quoting Indians is utterly uncool unless they are veteran politicians, poets or famous scientists also Indian names are risky as everyone would know about them.
I hope my unsolicited advice comes handy to you, although I have not written an separate disclaimer, if ever anything goes wrong with my unsolicited advice, then kindly use your brains and escape from the situation like I did today morning.
"Most people are other people. Their thoughts are someone else's opinions, their lives a mimicry, their passions a quotation." - Oscar Wilde
PS: I assume here that you are smart enough to avoid out-of-context quoting. You don't really need to read this post if you quote Winston Churchill's quotes on War when the discussion is about a cricket match.
Monday, 12 May 2008
All in the name of social networking
Somethings just kick off the deepest instinct in you, which you had been trying to suppress for ages. In my case it is the behaviour of homo sapien on these so called "social networking" sites, that sparks off my inner cynic. Cynicism is something I do best and have been trying to hide since some time now.
The other day, I logged into one of the most popular "social networking" sites, Orkut, there was a friend in my list whose face I could recognise but his name was "in London - new number for 2 months 0044...", I questioned given he is a guy and has no girlfriend, how many people would be calling him even while he was in India? If he starts counting on fingers, my bet is his right hand itself would suffice. Ok, I get it he is in London, then again guys is it that big a deal? In the days when travelling abroad is more of a matter of choice than chance, isn't flashing one's photo with Big Ben a bit too much. Take another instance, One of random guys (actually a friend's friend) puts his name as "in XYZ city, new pics uploaded" and was accompanied with a picture of him standing with 4 or so blond girls, all taller than him and a brief description of the guy in question would have words like short, dark, ugly, underweight etc. Off course we are so happy and delighted to gather that he has uploaded new pics, watching him in Vatican is such a delight I wad dying to see. Now could anyone explain me what has social networking to do with my knowing the fact that you are in some exotic European city and are embarrassing yourself by clicking pictures of yourself with relatively very beautiful people. I am more than certain that none of those chicks would have noticed that they were in frame.
"Orkutting" as the word has become, would showcase many such "cases" which escape my entire idea of social networking, in fact they escape my idea of any normal human behaviour. Consider this, one of girls in my friend list got addmission to SP Jain management institute, I know it is a good institute, but wouldn't taking a picture of yourself at the gate sign of the institute framing the name by your hands way off place. First thing that comes with the name of a very good institution is modesty, none of my friends I know from IIMs or IITs do such an idiotic act. But then again, modesty is not a virtue we have by and large.
Then we have a lot of "profiles" where "about me" is written as "why do you care" or "I'm here to find my old friends so f*** off" and similar offensive stands, now will someone tell these people that contrary to their self illusion the world out there is not chasing them to make friends with. It was sheer misfortune that we the poor guys landed on such profiles.
We have hoards of other people who really act foolish and think they are "cool" (amusingly it is also mentioned in such profiles that "I am cool,..."), we have girls who will put pictures of soft toys, babies etc in their profiles in name of privacy (also trying to act cute) and have no issues telling the whole world what they chitchat in scraps, their ideal match, what all and what not. We have guys who shall put their images on their bikes such as Pulsar or CBZ sporting a pair of goggles and think they are taken as lead in DHOOM 3, I am no girl's specialist but I am certain most of the sane ones will nauseate by even the thought of such an image, let alone watching it.
One may come up with the argument that those status messages, pictures etc are not for you, but are for specific people they know. Well, then there are more discrete ways of doing it, you could always send an email to all concerned people about your new number, or upload the pictures at some private album so that all concerned people are the only ones to see it, check that savour it. The truth is some of us suffer from a serious condition similar to exhibitionists, they think everyone wants to see and know what they are doing and if we see them in US or Europe we shall think they are cool....trust me that is delusional to the core.
The idea is modesty a word we fail to realise in our real life, and it is the virtue that commands respect and "coolness" in more streets term. I don't know what is social networking all about, but I surely know what it is not about and it is not about being stupid showoffs and hypocrites.
The other day, I logged into one of the most popular "social networking" sites, Orkut, there was a friend in my list whose face I could recognise but his name was "in London - new number for 2 months 0044...", I questioned given he is a guy and has no girlfriend, how many people would be calling him even while he was in India? If he starts counting on fingers, my bet is his right hand itself would suffice. Ok, I get it he is in London, then again guys is it that big a deal? In the days when travelling abroad is more of a matter of choice than chance, isn't flashing one's photo with Big Ben a bit too much. Take another instance, One of random guys (actually a friend's friend) puts his name as "in XYZ city, new pics uploaded" and was accompanied with a picture of him standing with 4 or so blond girls, all taller than him and a brief description of the guy in question would have words like short, dark, ugly, underweight etc. Off course we are so happy and delighted to gather that he has uploaded new pics, watching him in Vatican is such a delight I wad dying to see. Now could anyone explain me what has social networking to do with my knowing the fact that you are in some exotic European city and are embarrassing yourself by clicking pictures of yourself with relatively very beautiful people. I am more than certain that none of those chicks would have noticed that they were in frame.
"Orkutting" as the word has become, would showcase many such "cases" which escape my entire idea of social networking, in fact they escape my idea of any normal human behaviour. Consider this, one of girls in my friend list got addmission to SP Jain management institute, I know it is a good institute, but wouldn't taking a picture of yourself at the gate sign of the institute framing the name by your hands way off place. First thing that comes with the name of a very good institution is modesty, none of my friends I know from IIMs or IITs do such an idiotic act. But then again, modesty is not a virtue we have by and large.
Then we have a lot of "profiles" where "about me" is written as "why do you care" or "I'm here to find my old friends so f*** off" and similar offensive stands, now will someone tell these people that contrary to their self illusion the world out there is not chasing them to make friends with. It was sheer misfortune that we the poor guys landed on such profiles.
We have hoards of other people who really act foolish and think they are "cool" (amusingly it is also mentioned in such profiles that "I am cool,..."), we have girls who will put pictures of soft toys, babies etc in their profiles in name of privacy (also trying to act cute) and have no issues telling the whole world what they chitchat in scraps, their ideal match, what all and what not. We have guys who shall put their images on their bikes such as Pulsar or CBZ sporting a pair of goggles and think they are taken as lead in DHOOM 3, I am no girl's specialist but I am certain most of the sane ones will nauseate by even the thought of such an image, let alone watching it.
One may come up with the argument that those status messages, pictures etc are not for you, but are for specific people they know. Well, then there are more discrete ways of doing it, you could always send an email to all concerned people about your new number, or upload the pictures at some private album so that all concerned people are the only ones to see it, check that savour it. The truth is some of us suffer from a serious condition similar to exhibitionists, they think everyone wants to see and know what they are doing and if we see them in US or Europe we shall think they are cool....trust me that is delusional to the core.
The idea is modesty a word we fail to realise in our real life, and it is the virtue that commands respect and "coolness" in more streets term. I don't know what is social networking all about, but I surely know what it is not about and it is not about being stupid showoffs and hypocrites.
Friday, 9 May 2008
Boston Legal - Best of Danny Crane
I couldn't help but write the best dailogues from my favourite TV serial, Boston Legal. Behold the mad cow!
Random Girl: How much notice do you need?
DC: Ready now..
Random Girl: Condoms?
DC: (flashing a key ring with a string of 20 condoms) Danny Crane, to serve and protect...
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
DC: I had sex 10 min ago, right here...
Allan Shore: U had sex 10 min ago?
DC: Finished 9 min ago, I was incredible..
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
DC: We are going to New orleans? lets go and sieze the hookers, My p**** is already packed..
Allan: Danny, it's legal matter involving a death sentence..
DC: Danny crane, never lost a case, never will
Random girl: But I have only two tickets (smilling)
DC: Gee..I only have a Gulftream....(it's a private jet)
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
DC:(walking without trousers)
Sherley: Danny do you feel a breeze
DC: You think I am crazy, I spilled water on them, choice was between looking incompetent or eccentric, what would you choose?
Sherley: You could have waited
DC: And sit in my office all day long, Life is a cabaret man...(and walks on in full suit without trousers)
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
DC: I have an erection. That's a good sign. I'm ready to go to trial. Lock and load.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
DC: You hear the one about the fella who died, went to the pearly gates? St. Peter let him in. Sees a guy in a suit making a closing argument. Says, "Who's that?" St. Peter says, "Oh, that's God. Thinks he's Denny Crane."
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Denny Crane: How can you ban red meat?
Dominick Ryan: Well, they've got a whole campaign, they're going to go with it. They plan to promote Summersport as the seafood capital of the world.
Denny Crane: We're carnivores. When the pilgrims landed, first thing they did was eat a few Indians.
Dominick Ryan: [Shirley and Dominick stare at him] Is there anything we can do?
Shirley Schmidt: We'll get in the media TRO.
Denny Crane: I'll argue it myself. Ban red meat. That cannot pass Constitutional mustard.
Shirley Schmidt: The word is "muster", Denny, but you're right, the law lacks condiments.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Denny Crane: You left me, Shirley. Women don't leave Denny Crane. And for a secretary!
Shirley Schmidt: It was the Secretary of Defense.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Brian Stevens: Motion for continuance is denied.
Denny Crane: You know what I'm going to do, Brian, just to show you there are no hard feelings? I'm going to sleep with your wife.
Random Girl: How much notice do you need?
DC: Ready now..
Random Girl: Condoms?
DC: (flashing a key ring with a string of 20 condoms) Danny Crane, to serve and protect...
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
DC: I had sex 10 min ago, right here...
Allan Shore: U had sex 10 min ago?
DC: Finished 9 min ago, I was incredible..
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
DC: We are going to New orleans? lets go and sieze the hookers, My p**** is already packed..
Allan: Danny, it's legal matter involving a death sentence..
DC: Danny crane, never lost a case, never will
Random girl: But I have only two tickets (smilling)
DC: Gee..I only have a Gulftream....(it's a private jet)
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
DC:(walking without trousers)
Sherley: Danny do you feel a breeze
DC: You think I am crazy, I spilled water on them, choice was between looking incompetent or eccentric, what would you choose?
Sherley: You could have waited
DC: And sit in my office all day long, Life is a cabaret man...(and walks on in full suit without trousers)
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
DC: I have an erection. That's a good sign. I'm ready to go to trial. Lock and load.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
DC: You hear the one about the fella who died, went to the pearly gates? St. Peter let him in. Sees a guy in a suit making a closing argument. Says, "Who's that?" St. Peter says, "Oh, that's God. Thinks he's Denny Crane."
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Denny Crane: How can you ban red meat?
Dominick Ryan: Well, they've got a whole campaign, they're going to go with it. They plan to promote Summersport as the seafood capital of the world.
Denny Crane: We're carnivores. When the pilgrims landed, first thing they did was eat a few Indians.
Dominick Ryan: [Shirley and Dominick stare at him] Is there anything we can do?
Shirley Schmidt: We'll get in the media TRO.
Denny Crane: I'll argue it myself. Ban red meat. That cannot pass Constitutional mustard.
Shirley Schmidt: The word is "muster", Denny, but you're right, the law lacks condiments.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Denny Crane: You left me, Shirley. Women don't leave Denny Crane. And for a secretary!
Shirley Schmidt: It was the Secretary of Defense.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Brian Stevens: Motion for continuance is denied.
Denny Crane: You know what I'm going to do, Brian, just to show you there are no hard feelings? I'm going to sleep with your wife.
A brush of opulence
Past two days have been different, a treat to senses I must say. Yesterday was Akshay Tritiya, so I purchased gold for the first time in my life, in fact it was the first time I had seen pure gold. I recall once arguing with my mom that "why are people crazy about gold?", my mom replied with some irritation, "When you don't understand anything, then either ask question about it in inquisitive manner or just shut up!", I got my reply yesterday. It might be the psychological factor of spending money that could buy two designer denims and get in return a tiny metal, then respect for it is bound to go up. Whatever it is, but when you look at the yellow glitter of the tiny metal, there is a strange charisma of it, no wonder why blood has been splattered all across ages in pursuit of this gift of nature. Sudden burst of having money gushes through the spine, despite the fact that I did not have any money left after buying it.
Cut to today, I went to BOSE store to purchase my long time fantasy and the least expensive thing they offer - In Ear Headphones. Firstly as soon as I entered the store there was a prompt sales man, he walked up to me and greeted so politely that I was taken back, much like when you travel by air for the first time and and you are taken back the cosmetic politeness of air staff. I told him what I wanted, he obliged and gave me a demo of the headphones, everything it seemed was perfected, right from the store merchandising to their choice of demo song - it was "hotel california (live)" , while listening the song, I closed my eyes and it felt like the music was pumped directly in my head, had I kept my eyes closed for a little while longer I could have differentiated between notes from all 6 strings of the guitars. It goes unsaid that I was impressed, better word would be smitten and then they suggested me to try BOSE QC3, which were priced 4 times of what I was there to pay for, needless to say I passed. However I went ahead and made my payment, soon after that there was a guy who wanted to buy their home entertainment system (more on that guy in next post), they offered him a BOSE experience in a mini theatre they had, since there was some time in my billing they asked me to attend it as well. I said "why not!". It was a small room with 4 "large" Bose speakers, and a projection screen, the presentation movie went well and I thought it was OK till it reached the point when they explained how is BOSE different from the world. I quote the narrator, "a real movie experience is when you feel that you are in the scene", they showed a scene from a Russel Crowe starer pirate movie, where the crew shoots cannons, With the first shot I could feel a cannon whooshing past my left ear, I chill ran up my spine and suddenly I could feel another cannon dropping right in front of me, I was spellbound. I have been to several great movie theatres, but this small room gave me an audio-visual treat second to none. Then the presenter came and removed the lid from those "large" speakers and I jumped in my chair, there were 8 small cuboid speaker of the size no larger than those old glass paper weights we all had seen in sarkari offices. Nothing more was required from their store now, when they said "better sound through research", I totally agreed, just wanted to change it to "best sound through, check that heavenly sound through research or whatever magic you do"..
I remember when I was young (10 yrs or so) , I was told branded and designer stuff is just same as the local stuff we get on our nukkad, they are just packaged nicely to fool the rich people. Well, whoever told me that if I meet him now, it would have serious repercussions. First of all rich people are not fools, the very fact of their opulence makes their being smart redundant. Second of all, expensive stuff is not always packaged good, mostly it has something which is exclusive, someone who has not experienced a BOSE would never know it, because it is unmatched.
While I was leaving the BOSE store, the sales man said "Congratulations! sir", I was again surprised, "why?", promptly came the reply, "You are now a proud owner of BOSE product". I wondered is it that big a deal? Perhaps it is. For the first time in my life I felt rich after spending almost all the money I had in my bank :)
Who ever said, "Money can't buy you happiness" was bullshitting big time.
PS: Koi udhaar de do, I am broke :)
Cut to today, I went to BOSE store to purchase my long time fantasy and the least expensive thing they offer - In Ear Headphones. Firstly as soon as I entered the store there was a prompt sales man, he walked up to me and greeted so politely that I was taken back, much like when you travel by air for the first time and and you are taken back the cosmetic politeness of air staff. I told him what I wanted, he obliged and gave me a demo of the headphones, everything it seemed was perfected, right from the store merchandising to their choice of demo song - it was "hotel california (live)" , while listening the song, I closed my eyes and it felt like the music was pumped directly in my head, had I kept my eyes closed for a little while longer I could have differentiated between notes from all 6 strings of the guitars. It goes unsaid that I was impressed, better word would be smitten and then they suggested me to try BOSE QC3, which were priced 4 times of what I was there to pay for, needless to say I passed. However I went ahead and made my payment, soon after that there was a guy who wanted to buy their home entertainment system (more on that guy in next post), they offered him a BOSE experience in a mini theatre they had, since there was some time in my billing they asked me to attend it as well. I said "why not!". It was a small room with 4 "large" Bose speakers, and a projection screen, the presentation movie went well and I thought it was OK till it reached the point when they explained how is BOSE different from the world. I quote the narrator, "a real movie experience is when you feel that you are in the scene", they showed a scene from a Russel Crowe starer pirate movie, where the crew shoots cannons, With the first shot I could feel a cannon whooshing past my left ear, I chill ran up my spine and suddenly I could feel another cannon dropping right in front of me, I was spellbound. I have been to several great movie theatres, but this small room gave me an audio-visual treat second to none. Then the presenter came and removed the lid from those "large" speakers and I jumped in my chair, there were 8 small cuboid speaker of the size no larger than those old glass paper weights we all had seen in sarkari offices. Nothing more was required from their store now, when they said "better sound through research", I totally agreed, just wanted to change it to "best sound through, check that heavenly sound through research or whatever magic you do"..
I remember when I was young (10 yrs or so) , I was told branded and designer stuff is just same as the local stuff we get on our nukkad, they are just packaged nicely to fool the rich people. Well, whoever told me that if I meet him now, it would have serious repercussions. First of all rich people are not fools, the very fact of their opulence makes their being smart redundant. Second of all, expensive stuff is not always packaged good, mostly it has something which is exclusive, someone who has not experienced a BOSE would never know it, because it is unmatched.
While I was leaving the BOSE store, the sales man said "Congratulations! sir", I was again surprised, "why?", promptly came the reply, "You are now a proud owner of BOSE product". I wondered is it that big a deal? Perhaps it is. For the first time in my life I felt rich after spending almost all the money I had in my bank :)
Who ever said, "Money can't buy you happiness" was bullshitting big time.
PS: Koi udhaar de do, I am broke :)
Thursday, 8 May 2008
Friends
I have always had trouble making friends, that too guys are friends, big aaaarrrgghhh. Although I am jovial, I have always been part of the camaraderie, but friends? none till lately. I don't remember having any friend till I was in class IX, in that class I did a play for annual day and was playing the role of a weak husband, my wife's role was played by a senior. All the while we practiced, she tried to tell me the importance of friends, and I was smitten by her, so at the end she asked "so now, who do you want to make friends with?", I shamelessly said, "You!", she was trapped afterall she entered the danger zone by herself :). Long story short, she was my best friend for next two years.
Women (girls) were someone I was always comfortable with, in school I was the alpha-male, do not confuse it with being Casanova, I was the part of the 'boys' gang, but when it came to sharing personal jibber jabber, I used to turn to my dynamic circle of "friends" all of them girls, some from senior batch, some from my class. Hardly was there a guy who would have known more about me than my hostel warden. I just wasn't comfortable talkin emotional stuff with guys.
All went well, till it came, IIT Bombay. Not to say that there weren't girls here, but 5% is a number which is not only ignored, but also seen as noise in most cases and filtered out.
IT WAS A BIT TOO HONEST AFTER THIS, AS SUGGESTED BY PRAGYA, ALTHOUGH I DON"T SUBSCRIBE TO THE IDEA OF CHANGING MY POST BASED ON OTHERS' OPINIONS, BUT I CAN'T HELP THE FACT THAT MOST PEOPLE READING THIS WOULD LEAVE NO EVENT TO EMBARRASS ME
Women (girls) were someone I was always comfortable with, in school I was the alpha-male, do not confuse it with being Casanova, I was the part of the 'boys' gang, but when it came to sharing personal jibber jabber, I used to turn to my dynamic circle of "friends" all of them girls, some from senior batch, some from my class. Hardly was there a guy who would have known more about me than my hostel warden. I just wasn't comfortable talkin emotional stuff with guys.
All went well, till it came, IIT Bombay. Not to say that there weren't girls here, but 5% is a number which is not only ignored, but also seen as noise in most cases and filtered out.
IT WAS A BIT TOO HONEST AFTER THIS, AS SUGGESTED BY PRAGYA, ALTHOUGH I DON"T SUBSCRIBE TO THE IDEA OF CHANGING MY POST BASED ON OTHERS' OPINIONS, BUT I CAN'T HELP THE FACT THAT MOST PEOPLE READING THIS WOULD LEAVE NO EVENT TO EMBARRASS ME
Wednesday, 7 May 2008
Bana - Ras
Today morning I woke up and in the lazyness of the moment switched on the TV to watch a show covering Benaras street food. I jumped up in my bed to watch kashi chaat bhandar and kachori galli on the screen, it's always fun to watch one's own city on TV. Although Benaras has been covered in many small screen shows most of them lining up to show the mysterious, spiritual and holi side of the city to the likes of shobha dey and karan johar. There is a whole different side of the city which is almost always ignored by these YSL sporting south bombay dwellers, and that is the food of the place. The show in question although came close to it, but again the presenters were cliched ridden english speaking mumbaikars who think everyone in Benaras is like Amitabh in Chhora Ganga kinare waala.
The show took us to ghats, showed us stalls selling jalebi, kachori sabji, lassi etc which is a typical Benarasi breakfast, but one can't cover a city with so much of cullinary legacy in 30 minutes minus commercial breaks. So I decided to write this just to give a glimpse of what Benarasi food is about and how less we (and I) know about it.
I am an amateur cook, I love to cook, I learn every new dish that comes my way. So once I was asked by a girl I was hitting on that what all dishes I could cook, and like a smitten 15 yr old I started counting dishes I knew, off came words like, Rajma, Sambar, Sabji, Biryani, etc etc I never realised it till late that all those dishes were popular dishes served all across India and were made popular by excellent marketing by the respective states. Off course had I said I know how to cook Nimona, Bhauri-Chokkha, Pithouri and Tahri she would have run away ( which she did, by the way, irrespective of what I could cook)
The first shock that comes to any oursider is that meat is absent from any Benarasi preparation I know of, forget chicken even fish is not welcome in most kitchens there despite the fact that city was blessed with 2 ney 3 rivers ( I said 'was' because two of them have now turned into drains). So what do they eat? How can an entire cousine be created out of ghaas foos, Well we tend to confuse Benaras with Awadh because of its close proximity to Lucknow, which is known for its rich meat platter. But that is Lucknow - city of nawabs, we are Benaras - the city of gods.
Many preparations or their fundamental spices originated from Benaras, for instance ghughni a popular snack in Calcutta has its roots in Benaras, Dum Aalloo is a creation of Benaras. Sweets like Gulab Jamun, Rajbhog, Malai pudi and Khoa preparations were invented and perfected in the city. Even the spice mixtures which are the hearts of most of the popular preparations like mutter paneer, Rajma, Chhole etc were first made in Benaras. This is just to speak of the dishes which are known to us. The list of dishes which are not known to us and are or would be lost in time is equally large.
I went to a upscale Mumbai restaurant last week and while browsing through the menu I spotted a dish called Nimona (a heavenly preparation from the land of gods - Benaras), I was delighted, It was almost the first time I had spotted a traditional preparation on the such a decorated menu. I shall take a quick moment here to tell what is Nimona, it is a preparation
of fresh green peas and dried dumplings called kohndauri, it is partially is a daal and partially a sabji and fully yumm!
So you might ask the question, why is that we don't know much about all this? well the answer is we are laid back people, of all the people I know, Benarasis are least enterprising, how many Pandeys, Dubey, Tiwaris and Yadavs you know who have made to the CEO of a blue chip firm, or opened a company to lead. Don't count Mr. Bacchan, he is an anomaly. The idea is, food becomes popular when there enough people in a community to pay for it, traditionally Punjabis, Gujratis and Tamil Brahmins were the big hitters and the ones with enough disposable income adding to the eating out culture. Later Bengalis added to the league following the failed Naxal movement, all the "left intellectuals" took to IIMs and other reputed institutions just so to enter the corporate league. But we Benarasis were always taken by the dream of becoming IAS officers, politicians or sarkari jobs, We hardly had a culture of eating out, off course no restaurant in Delhi or Mumbai would serve Pithouri on their menu when the demand for Rajma is prime.
However, slowly but steady a small fragment of people like me, who left Benaras to study in the Bombays and the Delhis, and dream of making big bucks in US, Europe or Indian corporate sector would come up as a niche segment for such menu. All I dream for this is that the name of Nimona Chawal taken in the same breath as that of Rajma Chawal, a bit too far fetched, off course I don't have to pay for a dream :)
As a local city saying goes, Benaras is "Bana - Ras" which translates as "make taste". Allthough I despised the presenters of the show, I would end with a quote from their show.
"A morning with sabji and kachori, that is Benaras in full glory"
PS: Inputs taken from My brother, although he does not know it. Wiki has been helpfull and truth be told, I don't know how to prepare Nimona
The show took us to ghats, showed us stalls selling jalebi, kachori sabji, lassi etc which is a typical Benarasi breakfast, but one can't cover a city with so much of cullinary legacy in 30 minutes minus commercial breaks. So I decided to write this just to give a glimpse of what Benarasi food is about and how less we (and I) know about it.
I am an amateur cook, I love to cook, I learn every new dish that comes my way. So once I was asked by a girl I was hitting on that what all dishes I could cook, and like a smitten 15 yr old I started counting dishes I knew, off came words like, Rajma, Sambar, Sabji, Biryani, etc etc I never realised it till late that all those dishes were popular dishes served all across India and were made popular by excellent marketing by the respective states. Off course had I said I know how to cook Nimona, Bhauri-Chokkha, Pithouri and Tahri she would have run away ( which she did, by the way, irrespective of what I could cook)
The first shock that comes to any oursider is that meat is absent from any Benarasi preparation I know of, forget chicken even fish is not welcome in most kitchens there despite the fact that city was blessed with 2 ney 3 rivers ( I said 'was' because two of them have now turned into drains). So what do they eat? How can an entire cousine be created out of ghaas foos, Well we tend to confuse Benaras with Awadh because of its close proximity to Lucknow, which is known for its rich meat platter. But that is Lucknow - city of nawabs, we are Benaras - the city of gods.
Many preparations or their fundamental spices originated from Benaras, for instance ghughni a popular snack in Calcutta has its roots in Benaras, Dum Aalloo is a creation of Benaras. Sweets like Gulab Jamun, Rajbhog, Malai pudi and Khoa preparations were invented and perfected in the city. Even the spice mixtures which are the hearts of most of the popular preparations like mutter paneer, Rajma, Chhole etc were first made in Benaras. This is just to speak of the dishes which are known to us. The list of dishes which are not known to us and are or would be lost in time is equally large.
I went to a upscale Mumbai restaurant last week and while browsing through the menu I spotted a dish called Nimona (a heavenly preparation from the land of gods - Benaras), I was delighted, It was almost the first time I had spotted a traditional preparation on the such a decorated menu. I shall take a quick moment here to tell what is Nimona, it is a preparation
of fresh green peas and dried dumplings called kohndauri, it is partially is a daal and partially a sabji and fully yumm!
So you might ask the question, why is that we don't know much about all this? well the answer is we are laid back people, of all the people I know, Benarasis are least enterprising, how many Pandeys, Dubey, Tiwaris and Yadavs you know who have made to the CEO of a blue chip firm, or opened a company to lead. Don't count Mr. Bacchan, he is an anomaly. The idea is, food becomes popular when there enough people in a community to pay for it, traditionally Punjabis, Gujratis and Tamil Brahmins were the big hitters and the ones with enough disposable income adding to the eating out culture. Later Bengalis added to the league following the failed Naxal movement, all the "left intellectuals" took to IIMs and other reputed institutions just so to enter the corporate league. But we Benarasis were always taken by the dream of becoming IAS officers, politicians or sarkari jobs, We hardly had a culture of eating out, off course no restaurant in Delhi or Mumbai would serve Pithouri on their menu when the demand for Rajma is prime.
However, slowly but steady a small fragment of people like me, who left Benaras to study in the Bombays and the Delhis, and dream of making big bucks in US, Europe or Indian corporate sector would come up as a niche segment for such menu. All I dream for this is that the name of Nimona Chawal taken in the same breath as that of Rajma Chawal, a bit too far fetched, off course I don't have to pay for a dream :)
As a local city saying goes, Benaras is "Bana - Ras" which translates as "make taste". Allthough I despised the presenters of the show, I would end with a quote from their show.
"A morning with sabji and kachori, that is Benaras in full glory"
PS: Inputs taken from My brother, although he does not know it. Wiki has been helpfull and truth be told, I don't know how to prepare Nimona
Tuesday, 6 May 2008
We the educated
A small incidence to begin with, last year in May my family discovered that my astrological planets are not well in place and deep trouble is in stars by December. As a stereotypical brahmin family from Benaras, my mom flung in action and arranged for Mahamrityunjay jap which was supposed to run for 100001 jaaps by 11 pandits, add to it that I was supposed to be present there and it all had to take place in the auspicious month of saawan (july). All good till now, although I had little faith in this, I follow Mr Shaw's saying that "I don't believe in superstitions, but what's the harm in touching a wood". The pooja went well and I went back to my regular life, and almost forgot everything about the prophesy, then suddenly one fine afternoon in October I was informed of a trouble, my family and I tried to pacify things but all in vain and by December I was in gloom following a break up with my long time girlfriend (my family was humiliated in the process and she was married to someone else). Till that moment I had no faith in the prophesy and then I realised that some X factor has to be there. However the problem was with my scientific training, I am trained to validate theories. So the moment I thought that the prophesy was true, I countered it with the fact that had it been so true then the pooja should have worked, it did not and worst things happened to me, or did they?
I spoke to my mom, she is a 60 year old woman from Benaras, who did not go to study till matriculation and I asked her,
"mom, you said bad things were suppose to happen, and pooja would avoid it, but it didn't"
she replied calmly, "chhotu, bad things were suppose to happen, and they did not, you are looking at things that happened, just think that worst things could have happened, so the pooja was successful, it's just that you don't acknowledge something that did not occur"...
I was partially content with the answer, but as I said the scientific upbringing and the fancy degree from IIT became a huge obstacle in my path to correct realisation.
This happened way back in January, cut to today, May, I was reading "Black Swan" by renowned epistemologist-cum-banker-cum-philosopher Nassim Taleb, and he says I quote -
"This is a simple extension of the problem of knowledge. It is simply one side of Eco's Library, the one we never see, has the property of being ignored. We worry about those that happened, not those that may have happened but did not. It is why we platonify, liking known schemas and well-organized knowledge - to the point of blindness to reality"
For those who have trouble materialising what Mr. Taleb said, I shall summarise, He said exactly the same thing what my mom did. And he calls it Lucid Fallacy and also iterates that MBAs, Big time Academicians and so called Intellectuals have hard time understanding it. Then how come my mom knows it? I have it on good authority that she has not read Mr. Taleb.
What is it that Mr. Taleb iterates the same thing which I found dogmatic when my mom said it. Perhaps I found myself more "educated" than my mom, and when a "more educated" person reiterated it, I found it philosophy.
Perhaps our definition of "education" has a clinch, I spoke to all the "educated" people I know about my trouble, but it was only my mom who came up with this idea of ludic fallacy.
In fact Education is not all IIT, IIM or Harvard, education is something else, something that brings a woman from one of the most backward part of the world and a professor from one of the most admired business schools on the same platform.
All I know is "we the educated" are not so much of "educated" than suckers for the ludic fallacy.
PS: I love my mom and respect her ideas, but this is an ode to my new found respect for her intellect and thinking.
I spoke to my mom, she is a 60 year old woman from Benaras, who did not go to study till matriculation and I asked her,
"mom, you said bad things were suppose to happen, and pooja would avoid it, but it didn't"
she replied calmly, "chhotu, bad things were suppose to happen, and they did not, you are looking at things that happened, just think that worst things could have happened, so the pooja was successful, it's just that you don't acknowledge something that did not occur"...
I was partially content with the answer, but as I said the scientific upbringing and the fancy degree from IIT became a huge obstacle in my path to correct realisation.
This happened way back in January, cut to today, May, I was reading "Black Swan" by renowned epistemologist-cum-banker-cum-philosopher Nassim Taleb, and he says I quote -
"This is a simple extension of the problem of knowledge. It is simply one side of Eco's Library, the one we never see, has the property of being ignored. We worry about those that happened, not those that may have happened but did not. It is why we platonify, liking known schemas and well-organized knowledge - to the point of blindness to reality"
For those who have trouble materialising what Mr. Taleb said, I shall summarise, He said exactly the same thing what my mom did. And he calls it Lucid Fallacy and also iterates that MBAs, Big time Academicians and so called Intellectuals have hard time understanding it. Then how come my mom knows it? I have it on good authority that she has not read Mr. Taleb.
What is it that Mr. Taleb iterates the same thing which I found dogmatic when my mom said it. Perhaps I found myself more "educated" than my mom, and when a "more educated" person reiterated it, I found it philosophy.
Perhaps our definition of "education" has a clinch, I spoke to all the "educated" people I know about my trouble, but it was only my mom who came up with this idea of ludic fallacy.
In fact Education is not all IIT, IIM or Harvard, education is something else, something that brings a woman from one of the most backward part of the world and a professor from one of the most admired business schools on the same platform.
All I know is "we the educated" are not so much of "educated" than suckers for the ludic fallacy.
PS: I love my mom and respect her ideas, but this is an ode to my new found respect for her intellect and thinking.
We the boys
Troubled times makes one a philosopher. Off course philosophy includes no physical work, sitting idle and ruminating about things which have little or no consequence in practical life after all thinkers come dime a dozen.
Albeit this I treaded the same path, following the most turbulent time of my life, I started reading philosophy and found it enjoyable. The problem began when I started generalizing things. To make things straight I am a guy and to make it worst I am an engineer, I am hard-coded to think that every problem in this world has a solution, and so I thought with relationships. Well, had the world been a set of problems and solutions we would not have had soft subjects like literature, philosophy and economics (economists claim it to be a science..lol..only if u understand what is retrospective fitting).
So after all my efforts at fixing my relationship the scientific way failed, I resorted to escaping the thought of it. Reading philosophy was one pleasant respite. It told me that think of it this way that it was bound to happen, anything I could have done would have followed an alternative universe to reach the same state which is my present state....and my head hurts....
It turned out that philosophy was not something of a problem solver but more of a escaping the reality. Something like saying, "the problem never existed"...
Then I resorted to something which was close to my profession, finding patterns in events..and to my amusement, I figured out that I am a guy, and we guys react pretty much the same way to events. To begin with, we can't handle rejections. We like ego, ego is our food, be it going to the best college, having the most beautiful girl, having the highest paying job, we live on ego. All we do is to feed our ego. Even in break-ups guys are the ones who suffer the most, because lets accept it in the natural order of things, we are the chasers and women are the choosers. So when the girl goes off to be with someone else, it blows our self confidence. And when our ego is hurt, reasoning is the first thing that is damaged, all we see is revenge, retrospective regret etc. So post break up most of us turn to one of 4 things, which are
1) Working out, off course it's a good stress buster, but we do it mostly to gain confidence by looking good. How are we suppose to get a good looking girl with that extra subcutaneous fat in the adipose tissue (thank you, class IX biology)
2) Switching to higher paying job or work hard to get good grades in college, Success and Money are twin sisters and equally good at boosting ego
3) Hitting on other girls, to get over a breakup this is the best healer,
4) Sleeping, watching movies and getting depressed over the thought that what your ex would be doing as you think about her, would she be cuddling her new found love etc etc....This is the most common after-affect, go help those who do not come out of this mode quick enough...
Then we settle for the fact that someday I will earn more than her husband and show her, or I shall take revenge by doing this or that ( we can't take defeat you see)...
Finally with the help of family and friends, we tend to accept things and in this stage of remorse we accept what has happened and also accept the fact that we are helpless in avoiding certain events in life. Thereafter we find a new love or get married (which is same as finding new love, I just love the kick of getting married) and almost forget about what happened, till it happens next.
All said and done, we end up thinking and doing the same thing what philosophy tried to tell us in the beginning, but we follow and entire course of Denial, Anger, Bargain, Depression and Acceptance to reach the same point. You might think we the boys are foolish to do it everytime, but it turns out that this is a rite of passage for we the boys to become we the men.
As my sister says, it's part of growing up
PS: This might sound like I am a chauvinist, but as a matter of fact, I am been blamed of being feminist most of the times.
Albeit this I treaded the same path, following the most turbulent time of my life, I started reading philosophy and found it enjoyable. The problem began when I started generalizing things. To make things straight I am a guy and to make it worst I am an engineer, I am hard-coded to think that every problem in this world has a solution, and so I thought with relationships. Well, had the world been a set of problems and solutions we would not have had soft subjects like literature, philosophy and economics (economists claim it to be a science..lol..only if u understand what is retrospective fitting).
So after all my efforts at fixing my relationship the scientific way failed, I resorted to escaping the thought of it. Reading philosophy was one pleasant respite. It told me that think of it this way that it was bound to happen, anything I could have done would have followed an alternative universe to reach the same state which is my present state....and my head hurts....
It turned out that philosophy was not something of a problem solver but more of a escaping the reality. Something like saying, "the problem never existed"...
Then I resorted to something which was close to my profession, finding patterns in events..and to my amusement, I figured out that I am a guy, and we guys react pretty much the same way to events. To begin with, we can't handle rejections. We like ego, ego is our food, be it going to the best college, having the most beautiful girl, having the highest paying job, we live on ego. All we do is to feed our ego. Even in break-ups guys are the ones who suffer the most, because lets accept it in the natural order of things, we are the chasers and women are the choosers. So when the girl goes off to be with someone else, it blows our self confidence. And when our ego is hurt, reasoning is the first thing that is damaged, all we see is revenge, retrospective regret etc. So post break up most of us turn to one of 4 things, which are
1) Working out, off course it's a good stress buster, but we do it mostly to gain confidence by looking good. How are we suppose to get a good looking girl with that extra subcutaneous fat in the adipose tissue (thank you, class IX biology)
2) Switching to higher paying job or work hard to get good grades in college, Success and Money are twin sisters and equally good at boosting ego
3) Hitting on other girls, to get over a breakup this is the best healer,
4) Sleeping, watching movies and getting depressed over the thought that what your ex would be doing as you think about her, would she be cuddling her new found love etc etc....This is the most common after-affect, go help those who do not come out of this mode quick enough...
Then we settle for the fact that someday I will earn more than her husband and show her, or I shall take revenge by doing this or that ( we can't take defeat you see)...
Finally with the help of family and friends, we tend to accept things and in this stage of remorse we accept what has happened and also accept the fact that we are helpless in avoiding certain events in life. Thereafter we find a new love or get married (which is same as finding new love, I just love the kick of getting married) and almost forget about what happened, till it happens next.
All said and done, we end up thinking and doing the same thing what philosophy tried to tell us in the beginning, but we follow and entire course of Denial, Anger, Bargain, Depression and Acceptance to reach the same point. You might think we the boys are foolish to do it everytime, but it turns out that this is a rite of passage for we the boys to become we the men.
As my sister says, it's part of growing up
PS: This might sound like I am a chauvinist, but as a matter of fact, I am been blamed of being feminist most of the times.
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